 ood behavior is the crux of many major religions, but Christianity focuses more on who we are than what we do.
Let’s use forgiveness as an example. See Ephesians 4:22-32. Assume we have been terribly wronged, and we are angry. Before addressing the issue of forgiveness, let’s look at anger. Anger intrinsically is good. Like other emotions, they are created by God. Numerous places in the Old Testament describe God in anger. When someone misused Sabbath to cause intense suffering and torture, Christ was angry (Mark 3:1-5). So, don’t suppress or deny our anger (Ephesians 4:26). Though we should not suppress our anger, we should control it and express it within boundaries. We also should not let anger linger on, but rather gradually get rid of it, together with our bitterness and brawling. Otherwise, the devil could use anger as a beachhead to get to us (Ephesians 4:26-27, 31). Let’s get back to forgiveness. Why should we forgive? Christians forgive not because it is the moral things to do, but because in Christ, God forgave us, allowing us to be His children (Ephesians 4:32). Since God has forgiven our huge debt, we should forgive others’ small debts (Matthew 18:21-35). Christians forgive because our Father in heaven has forgiven us. Sometimes we don’t forgive others because we think we are better and would never commit such mistakes. Sometimes we won’t even forgive ourselves because we think our mistakes are too big to deal with. In both cases, we focus on ourselves. Instead, we should focus on Christ. Let Christ’s sacrifice for us melt our stubborn heart. Have mercy on others because God has been merciful to us (Matthew 18:33). By the way, it may take us awhile to learn to forgive others. Changing takes time. Be patient. In conclusion, we should channel our anger energy to attack and solve problems, and hold no ill will. Instead, we must forgive others because our heavenly Father has forgiven us, allowing us to be His beloved children. Summarized from a Tim Keller’s sermon https://gospelinlife.com/downloads/forgiving-and-forgiven-5647/ 我们不应该恨那些伤害我们的人吗？为什么要赦免？ 世界许多主要的宗教其核心都关注于人的好行为。但是，基督教更注重我们的所是而非所为。 让我们以饶恕为例（参看以弗所书4：22-32）。 假设我们受到了满腔委屈，而且为此生气。 在解决宽饶恕的问题之前，让我们先来思想一下愤怒。 愤怒本质上是好的。像许多其它的情绪一样, 它们都是上帝创造的。 比如, 在旧约许多地方都谈及上帝的愤怒。 当有些人滥用安息日的律法而造成严重痛苦和折磨时，基督很愤怒（马可福音3：1-5）。因此，不要压抑或否认我们的愤怒（以弗所书3：26）。 尽管我们不应该压抑自己的愤怒，但我们应该控制它。 表达愤怒应该有界限。 我们不应愤怒过久, 而要连同苦毒和爭吵一同逐渐地除去。否则，魔鬼会利用愤怒趁机潜进入我们的心 （以弗所书3：26-27，31）。 让我们回到饶恕。我们为什么要饶恕人？ 基督徒饶恕别人，不是因为道德。基督徒饶恕是因为在基督里，上帝饶恕了我们, 让我们成为祂的儿女 (以弗所书3：32）。既然上帝赦免了我们千万银子的巨债，我们也应该赦免他人十两银子的一点点小债（马太福音18：21-35）。 基督徒之所以饶恕，是因为我们的天父饶恕了我们。 有时，我们不饶恕他别人，认为自己比他们好，不会犯类似的错误。亦有时，我们甚至不饶恕自己，认为自己的错误太大，罪不可恕。在这两种情况下，我们都是专注自己。我们应该做的，乃是要将注意力集中于基督。 让基督为我们的牺牲融化我們頑固的心。怜悯他人，因为上帝一直在怜悯我们 （马太福音18:33）。 我们可能需要一段时间才能学会饶恕他人。改变是需要时间的。给我们自己一点时间，别着急! 总之，我们应当将愤怒的能量疏导来处理和解决问题， 而不要心怀恶意。饶恕他人，因为我们的天父饶恕了我们, 让我们成为祂蒙爱的儿女。
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